DOTLAN EveMaps

u'Grade-A "Tactical" Copium

*Description: A concentrated vapor used primarily by Fleet Commanders after losing an entire battleship wing to a single bomb run. It induces a state of calm where the user truly believes they "won the objective" despite losing 40 billion ISK.

*Side Effects: Uncontrollable urge to post "Didn\'t want those ships anyway" on r/Eve.

"Industrial Strength" Hopium

*Description: A heavy, viscous gas refined from the tears of solo miners. This grade is designed for those who believe that the next patch will definitely fix the economy and that their Rorqual is safe in a 1.0 system.

*Side Effects: Blurred vision, specifically regarding the "Local Chat" window and incoming red boxes.

Pure "Salt-Refined" Seethe

*Description: Not technically a booster, but a byproduct of the Copium refining process. Highly volatile. Used by pilots who have just been "baited on a free can" or caught in a gate camp.

*Side Effects: Rapid typing speeds, increased blood pressure, and an obsession with the killer\u2019s "Zkillboard" stats
.
"Already Replaced" Concentrate

*Description: A fast-acting liquid booster favored by veteran players. It numbs the pain of losing a Tech 2 hull by instantly reminding the brain of the 500 identical hulls sitting in Jita.

*Side Effects: A significant drain on the wallet and a false sense of infinite wealth.

The "Goalpost Shifter" Special

*Description: A rare, swirling gaseous mixture that allows a pilot to change the definition of "victory" mid-conversation. Perfect for defending a station that has already entered its final hull reinforcement.

*Side Effects: Mental gymnastics and extreme flexibility of logic.

"Success is just a failure that we haven\'t finished refining yet."
\u2014 Director of Reality Calibration, CPS.'